Dari kerana mata...

Assalamualaikum, Fascinating! Astounding! Marvelous! The best Sci-Fi movie! I love every part of it. Pandora; especially. The expression, Neytiri specifically. The technologies. The music. The language - that is specially created by a linguistic professor. What not to like about Avatar? :D Back at office, I watched the Making of Avatar. I am awed by James Cameron's determination to make Avatar happen. James, you are right to wait (since 1994) for the technology to catch up with you vision of this film. I am not surprise why I like the facial expression so very much. Special camera was used to capture the facial expressions. That is a WOW; I am all aching to see/hold/learn the camera. Experiencing Pandora Pandora was a fascinating place. It's a place that only exists in imagination rather than outer space. The vibrant colors left audience speechless. At first you'll only see green everywhere, thick-mysterious-and-danger forest. But when the night came, you'll see the...

Assalamualaikum, 2009 was a tough year. What can I say about 2009? Now that it has come to the end what can I say about it - can't hate it, didn't love it either. Life-changing events has happen the most this year. Those events were events that flexed every cell in me, changing me. It's a good improvement, though. If I were a house, architecturally I am better. I am a new person; a better person - wiser and stronger - even not the most. I feel... different and weird sometime - like a brand new doll. A sensation, if you ask me. Oh well. InsyaAllah, years are yet to come for me. So far, Allah's plan goes great for me. I am living and breathing because of Him and that is the reason to keep on fighting in this temporary world. Happy New Year 2010 all! May Allah bless each days that already passed and may He bless each coming days :D Wassalam.

Assalamualaikum, *I'm being extremely emotional about Edward due to Eclipse re-reading* ***WARNING: Post contain Eclipse spoiler*** “ Attraction was an impossible dilemma, because I was already too attracted to Bella in the worst way. Did I want Bella to be attracted to me, a woman to a man? That was the wrong question. The right question was should I want Bella to be attracted to me that way, and that answer was no. Because I was not a human man, and that wasn't fair to her. With every fiber of my being, I ached to be a normal man, so that I could hold her in my arms without risking her life. So that I could be free to spin my own fantasies that didn't end in with her blood on my hands, her blood glowing in my eyes .” ~ Edward Cullen, Midnight Sun “ For almost ninety years I've walked among my kind, and yours ... all the time thinking I was complete in myself, not realizing what I was seeking. And not finding anything, because you weren't alive yet .” ~ Twilight “ ...

Assalamulaikum, I am so into The Time Traveler's Wife; even blogging about the reading progress brings so much passion. This is an extension of previous blog post. Here are the excerpts towards the end of the book that I felt responsible to share. The first one is a part of Henry's letter to Clare and the second one is Clare's final words. As emotional as I am, these phrases made me cry. Read with heart and enjoy your journey... Wassalam. A Letter to be Opened in the Event of My Death pg 574 - 577 (...) Clare, I want to tell you, again, I love you. Our love has been the thread through the labyrinth, the net under the high-wire walker, the only real thing in this strange life of mine that I could ever trust. Tonight I feel that my love for you has more density in this world than I do, myself: as though it could linger on after me and surround you, keep you, hold you. I hate to think of you waiting. I know that you have been waiting for me all your life, always uncertain of ...

Assalamualaikum, I am a traveler. I am always excited to travel. I am the traveler. Because I belong to nowhere, I travel from this place to other place(s) where my presence makes sense and where my soul could rest. But my dear, traveling is tiring. I'm always a loner for each journey and forever a visitor. A traveler dreamed of staying, too. This heart of mine, an open book, a traveler's journal - are we that hard to read ? Wassalam.

Assalamualaikum, [Background song: Broken by Lifehouse] It's been a while since I finished reading the Time Traveler's Wife and I am still not quite sure on how to write the finality of the book. "Clare, I want to tell you, again, I love you. Our love has been the thread through the labyrinth, the net under the high-wire walker, the only real thing in this strange life of mine that I could ever trust. Tonight I feel that my love for you has more density in this world than I do, myself: as though it could linger on after me and surround you, keep you, hold you. (...) I love you, always. Time is nothing." ~ Henry's letter to Clare; after his death~ This book has a special personification that detained time in its own hourglass. You are personally here and there, where Henry and Clare were - witnessing their twisted fate. It was a sensation of moving through ticking seconds from inside a transparent capsule. The book's main theme were " waiting " and ...

Assalamualaikum, "Fairytales can come true; You gotta make 'em happen, it all depends on you" ~ Excerpt from "Almost There" from Princess and the Frog movie. Above phrase made Princess and the Frog different from any other fairy tales - it's a dialogue from Tiana's father. Princess and the Frog promote new value in princesses - fairy tales can come true, but it depends on princesses' effort. In most of fairy tales, princesses were always wishing upon a star, did nothing but waiting (and singing). Suddenly their wish granted by a fairy and the Prince Charming would come and break all spell... and they live happily ever after. The End. A princess can do more than just wishing, waiting, singing and being pretty. We princesses can be delicate and graceful, we cried our heart out over small matters, but we are not disabled . Princesses have other dream other than her Prince Charming, and princesses can and will work to achieve her dreams. This is 21st c...

Assalamualaikum, Monday, 14 December 2009. Our rented house was burgled. I lost a Lumix FX33 digital camera - luckily the memory card was with me, my old hand phone - with all the phone numbers, birth dates and precious love messages, and a full froggy bank with estimated MYR150+ in it. Total loss: MYR2500+ It was shocking. I came home to find Aida alone at the hall, telling me that "our house has been burgled; rooms were thrashed and Naimah lost her laptop". And I knew it, I've lost my camera and the froggy bank... and my back pack - the burglar thrashed everything inside it and used it to carry all the stolen items... and the phone - the last thing I notice. Total house loss: MYR6000+ - Iffa’s digital camera and Naimah’s laptop. What’s lost is lost. We sad and angry, but we were grateful that none of us was taking half day yesterday. I couldn’t imagine anyone of us being in the house the same time with the burglar. He might use a knife to open the doors! Alhamdulillah, ...

Assalamualaikum, For friends who follow my Facebook's status on Saturday; 5 December 2009, you'd probably know that I took a train from Arau to Butterworth and stand all the way. It was a 100 years worth of journey and experience! I was attending my housemate's wedding and eventually I was the lucky bridesmaid :D It was her husband's side's reception and since I bailed on her wedding reception, it's a must-attend event. Due to I had another wedding invitation the next day, I decide to go back to Penang right after the wedding - with the bridesmaid dress. Long story short, there was no bus and I was suggested to ride on a train instead. The train; Ekpress Langkawi (EL7) was supposed to arrived at 5.30 pm, but delayed until 6.40 pm. The KTM staff notified me that seat not guaranteed for trip to Butterworth and I can find any empty seat throughout the journey. I was not in the mood to be fussy, with additional motivation from Naimah and Kak Chik - I said OK. I didn...

Assalamualaikum, The consciousness of his love makes my heart wants to jump out of my chest and my soul wants to escape from this body of mine; all they want to do is be with him. Seeing him is all I longed each seconds, but seeing him is the worst moment that makes me greedier and I keep wanting for more seconds... I'm missing him more and more... This love is hard... and as crazy as I already is, I love it this way. Wassalam

Assalamualaikum, Golden Screen Cinema, Queensbay Mall, Penang. 9.50 pm, C19. A moment of truth... I LOVE IT!!! Oh my... I have so many things to say about New Moon. I'll try to keep it the shortest :D To Stephanie Meyer for her great writings; to Chris Weitz for sticking to the book, to Melissa Rosenberg for the screenplay, and to the production team of New Moon: Thank you for bringing all my favorite parts into living moments - all are the parts I will read every time. You have done it GREAT. Oh yes, some people might not agree with me; as some prefer tea over coffee. The world is not perfect and it's okay :p I know the saga by heart, and I'm not watching New Moon to know the story. I'm watching New Moon to see it in flesh and blood (and abs if I may add), to witness the moments being pictured by different minds and to give credit to the team for their effort in bringing a fiction to real life. New Moon the movie is just like New Moon the book. Hate the beginning; hat...

Assalamualaikum, I was feeling... disappointed. Why? "Same old, same old", I said. Then ALLAH sent a song to me. A song so soothing; that I can feel the blaze inside me dying with each "Allah knows". Yes, HE knows. Wassalam Allah Knows Zain Bhikha When you feel all alone in this world And there's nobody to count your tears Just remember, no matter where you are Allah knows Allah knows When you're carrying a monster load And you wonder how far you can go With every step on that road that you take Allah knows Allah knows CHORUS No matter what, inside or out There's one thing of which there's no doubt Allah knows Allah knows And whatever lies in the heavens and the earth Every star in this whole universe Allah knows Allah knows When you find that special someone Feel your whole life has barely begun You can walk on the moon, shout it to everyone Allah knows Allah knows When you gaze with love in your eyes Catch a glimpse of paradise And you see your ch...

Assalamualaikum, " CLARE : Henry is sleeping on the sofa with a book spread open on his chest. Borges's Ficciones. He is shaved and I lean over him and breathe; he smells fresh, his damp gray hair sticking up as always. Alba is chattering with Teddy in her room. For a moment I feel as though I've time traveled, as though this is some stray moment from before, but then I let my eyes travel down Henry's body to the flatness at the end of the blanket, and I know that I am only here and now ." pg. 533 Henry lost his feet. Henry is depressed. Clare is depressed. I feel depressed, too. I understand clearly when Clare said: "For a moment I feel as though I've time traveled, as though this is some stray moment from before, but then I let my eyes travel down Henry's body to the flatness at the end of the blanket, and I know that I am only here and now". She needs an escape door with a big-glowing EXIT sign - unlock. When the one we love suffer, we suff...

Assalamualaikum, *Background music: Broken by Lifehouse* ~ The broken clock is a comfort, it helps me sleep tonight, Maybe it can stop tomorrow from stealing all my time~ " CLARE : I was completely drunk with the notion of a baby: a baby that looked sort of Henry, black hair and those intense eyes and maybe very pale like me and smelled like milk and talcum powder and skin, a sort of dumpling baby, gurgling and laughing at everyday stuff, a monkey baby, a small cooing sort of baby. I would dream about babies. In my dreams I would climb a tree and find a very small shoes in a nest; I would suddenly discover that the cat/book/sandwich I thought I was holding was really a baby; I would be swimming in the lake and find a colony of babies growing at the bottom. (...) I wanted someone to love who would stay: stay and be there, always. And I wanted Henry to be in this child, so that when he was gone he wouldn't be entirely gone, there would be a bit of him with me... insurance, in ca...

Assalamualaikum, I am forever Team Edward. But I'd choose Jacob in real life. 1st because he is tan :p 2nd because he is real and more practical. 3rd because he is there [when the love, the life and the meaning walk away.]. Full stop. 1st: I have better perception towards normal-skinned-Malay guys. No offense, but tan guys seem more reliable than less tan guys. No fact, but that's what I think. 2nd: He is human, even if half. He is warm, which is good because I don't prefer anything cold (or anyone, in this case). 3rd: I said it once and for all - that love of my life (LOML) shouldn't leave me and shouldn't hurt me no matter for what reason - even if it involve the world peace. Once you leave, you leave for good. As for ‘Jacob’, well, considering LOML left, then I am so single. What's not to love in Jacob, anyway? :D Anyway, I do believe now, a ‘Jacob’ would not do any harm; especially if the ‘Jacob’ is as hot as Taylor Lautner. LOL! Wassalam.

Assalamualaikum, We keep on saying, a picture worth a thousand words. Instead of worth a thousand words, it tells stories - untold stories and stories unknown even by the self. I am not a photographer and I never learn the art of photographing, but I know from shows I watched on television - what pictures can tell - the photographer's feeling towards his/her model, the models' feeling toward the photographer, the feelings saturated among models. I've been 'listening' to a picture that speaks aloud stories in it. Of course, it's my desktop wallpaper - a picture of me and my friends, taken during a friend's wedding. I must say, the photographer must have seen it and he captured the moment of us sitting together - loosen up. The picture turns out stunning [what with some enhancement]. We all love it very much. Then it started to speak. ... he is the boyfriend ... she is the girlfriend ... she used to like him ... he used to like her ... she's comfortable wi...

Assalamualaikum, " CLARE : It’s hard being left behind. I wait for Henry, not knowing where he is, wondering if he’s okay. It’s hard to be the one who stays . I keep myself busy. Time goes faster that way. I go to sleep alone, and wake up alone. I take walks. I work until I’m tired. I watch the wind play with the trash that’s been under the snow all winter. Everything seems simple until you think about it. Why is love intensified by absence? Long ago, men went to sea, and women waited for them, standing on the edge of the water, scanning the horizon for the tiny ship. Now I wait for Henry. He vanishes unwillingly, without warning. I wait for him. Each moment that I wait feels like a year, an eternity . Each moment is as slow and transparent as glass. Through each moment I can see infinite moments lined up, waiting. Why has he gone where I cannot follow? " " HENRY : ...I hate to be where she is not, when she is not. And yet, I am always going, and she cannot follow."...

Assalamualaikum, If you belong to a clique, probably you have asked this question: Who'll be the first to get married? I consider myself belong to a clique and I have asked the question; and the answer is... Azah Kamarudin. Azah weds her beloved, Ariff and we were attending their wedding reception on 21 November 2009. Well, 'attending' sounds underrate - we were breaking all the silence and wrecking all the guest protocol :D I hope we brought extraordinary sunshine and happiness into their wedding. Moments were captured in beautiful pictures - the professional wedding photographer who 'bullied' us with sorts of pose and the candid from Amir, Ikmal and Kamal [waiting to be uploaded!]. Lovely, lovely pictures... In car I said: Kawen juga Azah *sigh* It feels like we were just graduated from secondary school yesterday. With Azah already a wife, and Awin, Fahmi and Nana’s wedding around the corner, seem like the hourglass has been turn – the sand is filling the other h...

Assalamualaikum, In the bus, on my way to work; 20th November 2009. I was lost in my thoughts - mostly thinking about Edward Cullen and his golden eyes - maybe falling asleep as usual when I caught a conversation between two women behind me. Woman A was telling woman B about her husband falling and marrying another woman! Ouch. What a morning topic. I peek through the mirror and saw her somewhat-calm expression while she spoke. Then, she was saying: "My mother in law was asking me, whether the news was true, that her son have married another woman. What else I can say except "I don't know, most probably yes". She said she'll never accept that other woman into her family..." "He's always texting, even late at night." "I gave him an ultimatum; to choose between me or the woman. And he claim that he'd want to married that woman but remain our marriage..." "All patients have its limit. I'm off of it." I don't know ...

Assalamualaikum, Be not afraid of going slow, be afraid of standing still. I grew up with above saying. It's something my lovely aunty shared with me - I think she wrote it on a piece of paper and I always see that paper throughout the years. A simple phrase yet motivated - I know it today that it was edited from a Chinese proverb: " Be not afraid of growing slowly, be afraid only of standing still ." It's sort of a principle, the way I see and live life. I told myself once and keep on repeating it - giving me peace and sanity each time I learn something new; making me less tense. It tailored my expectation towards other people's effort as well. My world spins fast - which I like it that way, but this phrase manages to keep me calm whenever some element slowed down. In other words, it saves me from feeling repugnantly less intelligent from others. Hahaha. And - I need to add this - set a goal that no matter how hard the learning was and the fact that I am so not c...

Assalamualaikum, I've just finished watching Stephanie Meyer's interview in the Oprah Winfrey Show; on Youtube. WOW! Awesome! Great! I don't know who Stephanie Meyer is to others, but she is special to me. She's the author who lured me to start reading English fiction and apparently a combustion of love for reading. Before Twilight Saga, I only read [mostly] non-fictions and fictions that were in line with self-improvement or psychology - stuff like Mitch Albom. But never like Twilight Saga - an epic of something impossible to exist - and other novels. Thanks to her, my reading frenzy is [insanely] increasing. I feel like forcing her to write new books every month so that I can have material to read. Hahahaha! She's a phenomenon! She's a 35 years old stayed-at-home mom turn multi gazillionaire. Despite that she never read vampire books - the only genre she never read - she didn't even write a journal about herself and she never even write a single short stor...

Assalamualaikum, "Rainy season Frog leap happily Girl looks out of window sadly" I have to say and you have to agree with me - that all come in pair. Even sad thing come with something happy. I might be sad of an occurrence [I am sad] but that same occurrence might make someone else happier. Do not deny it and do not "world-is-not-fair" me :p It's a fact, deal with it. Stuff happen for reason. Look on the bright side. "Sunshine is delicious, Rain is refreshing, Wind braces us up, Snow is exhilarating; There is really no such thing as bad weather,Only different kinds of good weather. Wassalam.

Assalamualaikum, 16:37 Saturday 14 November 2009. I was at USM's Hamzah Sendut Library; just finishing my slides for Monday's presentation - The Pareto Chart - somehow, I was 'joining' Ayu's MBA Accounting group discussion. There were 10 people discussing all-about: accounting and business and management and culture - stuff I have no idea at all. Some of them are taking this course full-time and another half are taking it part time. Well, I have to thank Ayu for 'inviting' me into her campus life today. It's a very precious moment, to be at USM and being here in this library; observing their discussion. Timeless if I may exaggerate. I think I could sit here forever! [Another exaggeration] I am so missing the campus life...Truly. Being there, seeing those people's effort in pursuing their ambition flamed the desire in me. [ Is it a sign?] The full-timers reminded me of the one I might have been if I studied smarter and harder. As for the part-timers ...

Assalamualaikum, It's 13 November 2009. I saw a crescent moon this morning from one of my home's window... just like the one for Twilight Saga New Moon. Unfortunately, I forget to capture the moment. *Ugh!!!* 13 days to go before New Moon Malaysia's premier. Oh, can 26 November please come faster! It's unbearable, this longing and waiting. This is madness. I am in need to get this New Moon out of my system so that I can continue with my task. More and more of New Moon on the net each single day. More pictures, more posters, more merchandises, more Kristen, more Edward, and more Jacob. News is flooding my Facebook page from both Twilight and Twilight Examiner. But, the fans would agree with me: We never had enough :D I'm looking forward to watch the break up scene and the saddest period in Bella's life. Kristen made it so real and I can't wait to feel the "big hole has been punched through my chest" sensation. Kristen's been explaining the break...

Assalamualaikum, This week is our final week with Ummi. Alhamdulillah, Ummi's transfer's application approved and she's on her way back to her beloved family - her caring husband, lovely children and her 1st granddaughter, Aleesya. Though we are so very sad to lose our Ummi, we are happy that Ummi got to be with her family everyday :D ~'Aini & Ummi Ummi has always been a mother figure of our little home. She is my Ummi even before Mak passed away, more after that. To have her makes our life different in so many ways compare to other; even though we are far away from our love ones, we somehow form a family bonding here on a foreign land. This rented house feels just like home - always warm to come home to. With Ummi leaving, I not quite sure what to expect. After Ummi's departure, another 3 housemates eventually leaving, too - Kak Maizan (transferred to her hometown), Kak Aju and Kak Mala (graduted from KPLI). And Aida too, after that - her husband transferred ...

I said: It's time to do something for myself. And now I'm hearing a voice singing this phrase from Reflection (I prefer Lea Salonga's version in Mulan): "...Now I see That if I were truly to be myself I would break my family's heart Who is that girl I see Staring straight back at me? Why is my reflection someone I don't know? Somehow I cannot hide Who I am Though I've tried When will my reflection show who I am inside? When will my reflection show who I am inside?" Especially the part: "That if I were truly to be myself, I would break my family's heart". I am weighing options in my life. There's an urge to make decisions - that happen to have impact to people around me - tough decisions. It feels like I am riding on a very fast transportation without any destination; the GPS giving options of turn - and I can't even put my mind together to make a choice... yet I have to make decision fast. Arrrrrgghhhh!!! I might explode, someday....

Assalamualaikum, “ First snow falls Snowflakes glitter No love wish Soft white snow Landed on my palm Heart is lonely Snowflakes melting On hair and clothes Chest is cold Coldness touches earth Lake froze Love stood Winter wind blows Make me shiver Tears heated heart " My first haiku. It was Thursday – a “cloudy and highly-flammable” – as I share with Kak Maz. I felt a pulse inside me rising and pushing me back into the black hole of melancholy. I just have to emphasize the feelings that reside in me. Haiku; I said. I’d called this “First Snow”. Sad theme, yes it is. It was because this haiku did inspired by the sadness in me. Apparently, after this haiku written I was inspired by an oldies song “You’re My Everything” and a sweet and nice and lovely haiku started to fill in the air: “ Sun kiss and smiles Flowers blooming Love loving ” Wassalam.

Assalamualaikum, There’s a song that keep on playing in my head since I was 10 years old. The song brings along sweetest memory a 10 year old girl could have. It’s Song of Joy. I grew up memorizing the melody, each single day so that I will not forget about it. I was too young to know who composed it, or how I would be able to find it. Back at that time, internet was not an application all houses were equipped with, not even as mobile or easy accessed as today. Therefore, the best I could do is to mention the title to as many potential people as I can. The return was no one ever knows about it. Let’s talk about the 10 years old girl and the song, shall we? A 10 years old girl had a crush on her senior. The boy was predicted to be school’s next best student – he was 12. Well, she’s only a 10 years old girl, living in a small village where news spread like all houses have their doors stick together. So, not much action could be taken, not that she had options; the crush remained as crush...

Akhirnya, runut bunyi untuk drama bersiri Nur Kasih telah mula dimainkan di corong-corong radio. Juga bermaksud mp3 runut tersebut, nyanyian Yasin boleh dimuat turun di internet! Drama Nur Kasih seolah-olah mengakhiri ketandusan drama bertema keagamaan di Malaysia. Telah sekian lama para penonton disogokkan dengan karya bertema keagamaan dari negara seberang. Apa yang menariknya mengenai Nur Kasih; selain kontroversi para pelakonnya, adalah kebanyakan penonton mula tertarik dengan trailer dan runut bunyinya sebelum dramanya. Ada yang meletakkan Nur Kasih sebagai drama keagamaan terbaik. Tetapi tidak ada yang sempurna selain DIA. Nur Kasih, dalam membawakan tema dan mesej keagamaan yang mudah dan agak biasa; masih kuat dgn garapan dialog dan olahan skrip serta jalan cerita yang menjadikannya sebuah karya yang menarik. Ditangan Khabir Bhatia serta sinematografinya yang baik, kisah Aidil, Adam, Nur Amina, Ustaz Hassan, Hajjah, Kat, Alia serta lain-lain watak menjadi sebuah pementasan kehi...

Assalamualaikum, This would be a very simple post; I’m sharing a lovely and great song by Sara Bareilles, Gravity. [ Another thank you note for Kak Maz for her sharing in Facebook ]. I find the lyric suited a story I’ve trying to tell. I doubted to find any other songs or phrases that simply explain how love could be. So to say, how one just can’t get his/herself out from the love chain at any defines condition the love is. It is because the touch of love is the gravity. It was so hard to write any single elaboration as the lyric illustrated all. Enjoy! Wassalam. Gravity by Sara Bareilles Something always brings me back to you. It never takes too long. No matter what I say or do I'll still feel you here 'til the moment I'm gone. You hold me without touch. You keep me without chains. I never wanted anything so much than to drown in your love and not feel your reign. Set me free, leave me be. I don't want to fall another moment into your gravity. Here I am and I stand so...