Skip to main content


Showing posts from March, 2015


Telur hancur, kentang lecek dan air koko. Bersarapan seorang diri hari ni. Hakim, Isma dan anak-anak pergi Pulau Pinang awal pagi ini. I'm going back to Penang as well after almost a week. Entah jam berapa tidak pasti. Susah sedikit mahu "keluar" dari rumah ni kalau dah masuk. Rahmat dan hikmah dalam ujian kesihatan kali ni - dapat meluangkan masa di Taiping selama 6 hari. Memang patut pun memandangkan aku dah gunapakai cuti minggu lepas untuk aktiviti di Penang. Pagi yang sunyi tanpa anak-anak.
After Mak passed away, even after Abah remarried, it is the kids that make this house a home. Rumah jadi berseri-seri dengan kehadiran Isma dan anak-anak. Aku pernah beritahu Isma, it would be hard to come home if they weren't here. Everything feels right with them in the equation. Walaupun aku tak tinggal di rumah ni, ketiadaan mereka sangat-sangat dirasai. Sebab tu setiap kali cuti sekolah dan Hari Raya, aku agak cuak kalau-kalau mereka mahu ke mana-mana. …

From High Heels to Sport Shoes

千里之行,始於足下 “The journey of a thousand miles begins with a single step.” - Lao Tzu
Yes. It all begins with a single step. In my case, it also consists of all the rejection I made in the past. I have very less interest to involve in sports and running is the last thing on my mind. I don’t hate it; I just don’t run. That is my limit. When I finally took the challenge and ran my first 7 km, the boundary blurred out. Before I know it, I have surpasses my target this year to run 10 km: I have run 12 km! Taking the first step begins a journey; but you need a good companion to stays on it and to finish it. I am lucky to have a supportive team in the form of Revert Sports Club (RSC). RSC not only provide me all the support a beginner needs, they also open up the opportunity to spread dakwah and good messages via sports.
How to start a sport (or a healthier lifestyle):
1. Made up your mind – Stop making excuses and put on the sport shoes 2. Do it now – It’s now or never. Until you try som…

Si Kecil Bernama Wisdom

"Love conquers all things except poverty and toothache." - Mae West
Memang tak pernah faham kenapa gigi geraham bongsu disebut sebagai "wisdom tooth". Hahaha. Tapi selepas pembedahan kecil untuk mengeluarkan salah satu gigi geraham bongsu semalam, I think I can understand the wisdom part a little bit better. Yes. I had my wisdom tooth extracted yesterday. It was definitely a journey full of wisdom! A minor oral surgery - with document to sign, local anesthetic, *drilling* and stitching. Lebih lagi bila bangun pagi tadi dengan rahang kanan yang bengkak dan sakit - one cheek chipmunk, indeed.
Dental stuff makes me nervous. Menunggu giliran di Jabatan Pembedahan Mulut, Hospital Pulau Pinang adalah sangat mendebarkan. Even scarier than a morgue, I told Mr. T. Bagus juga dapat berbual ringan dengan beliau. The conversation distracted me from the uneasy feeling. While I was driving to hospital, I told myself that I can undergo this procedure. This is no…

Waiting Places

"The Waiting Place…for people just waiting.

Waiting for a train to go or a bus to come, or a plane to go or the mail to come, or the rain to go or the phone to ring, or the snow to snow or waiting around for a Yes or No or waiting for their hair to grow. Everyone is just waiting.

Waiting for the fish to bite or waiting for wind to fly a kite or waiting around for Friday night or waiting, perhaps, for their Uncle Jake or a pot to boil, or a Better Break or a string of pearls, or a pair of pants or a wig with curls, or Another Chance. Everyone is just waiting.

No! That’s not for you!
Somehow you’ll escape all that waiting and staying. You’ll find the bright places where Boom Bands are playing. With banner flip-flapping, once more you’ll ride high! Ready for anything under the sky. Ready because you’re that kind of a guy!"

Oh! The Places You’ll Go!
by Dr. Seuss

Paper Cut

Because it still hurts. Because to love like *that* still hurts. Because the thought of committing into *that* type of relationship still send me towards the edge of a cliff. A long way to fall.
My battle scars are paper cuts. Quick and clean. All over my heart. A cut too tiny to be tended profusely, but the pain is too significant to ignore.
Luckily, like paper cut, it doesn't happen every day; it doesn't happen that often. It doesn’t give rational reason to avoid paper.
But it still hurts.


This weekend I was blessed with the chance to attend a dakwah training. Furthermore, Allah has granted my wish to ask for dakwah tips for introverts from the speaker.
But what I am going to share in this entry is his advice about marriage - tips cari jodoh. Dari jauh tips ni datang, spontan dan tiba-tiba masa beliau menjawab soalan aku.
Katanya, forget about background. As if to say, don't think too much. Tak perlu nak fikir banyak sangat tentang kriteria. Marriage is not build only with a 100% perfect person. Tak ada manusia yang sempurna dalam dunia ni. If a person is 80% good (Islamic-comply), accept him/her and hold on to that 80%. The 20% ambiguous about him/her is what a married couple should work for. Meaning, that is where we completes each other.
We fall in love with opposite strength; we go home to live with opposite weaknesses. Terasa rangkap ni sangat siknifikan hari ni. Earlier today, someone said something similar to this - about complementing each o…

A Better Perspective for A Better Fight


“This is not stress. This is a person managing new challenges in her life.”
In this office, we almost never use the word "problem". It is always and strongly recommended to use "issue". It is because, "problem" will make people to react defensively while "issue" suggests the need to discuss. Potato, potahto? Well, it makes a lot of differences.
Issue: an important topic or problem for debate or discussion Problem: a matter or situation regarded as unwelcome or harmful and needing to be dealt with and overcome.
Handling this latest *challenge* after being touched by anxiety, I find this technique very helpful. Alhamdulillah. All Praise be to Allah. I can't think properly if I keep falling apart. I will survive, somehow, but it will be me against two elements: 1) The pressure and 2) the act of pulling and holding myself together throughout the process. I just can't afford to spend more energy unnecessarily...
So I told my alm…

Asam Pedas dan Senyuman Manjamu

Izinkan saya untuk jiwang sakan hari ini ^_____^

Kenapa saya suka lagu ni? Sebab lagu ni padan dengan perasaan saya.
The first attribute I usually notice in a person is SMILE. I like people with sincere smile. Senyuman yang bila kita tengok sekali pun dah jatuh sayang. Siap dengan mata pun tersenyum sekali. It is as if we are seeing the beautiful soul inside. The type of smile that makes you want to trade the world just to keep it on that face. The smile you want to spend the rest of your remaining life with.

*That* is the smile.
*That* is the person :)

Tajuk: Dengarlah Rindu
Penyanyi: Farhan Azizan
Lagu/Lirik: Nurzaidi Abd Rahman
Hakcipta: Gemerzik Music & Sound Works Sdn Bhd

Kau curi hatiku dengan senyum manjamu
Membuai hatiku yang lara
Tak perlu mencuba hanya biasa saja
Bagiku kau sungguh mempesona

Tak usah ditanya dari mana datang cinta
Hadirnya tidak pernah terpaksa
Dirimu itulah mana cintaku berada
Akan jadi milikmu selamanya

Sayang engkau dengarlah rinduku
Yang selalu berl…

This Close

I am *this* close to quit But that is not me I don't easily quit
I am not a quitter
Frustration makes me want to quit Confusion makes me want to quit Anger makes me want to quit No! I can't quit I am too proud to give up and quit
I am not a quitter
But everything has expiry date And the expiry date on my patience wears of day by day
I am *this* close to quit But that is not me I don't easily quit I am not a quitter

Rant on Ahmad Ziyad and the Guys

Emosional betul dengan pengakhiran drama bersiri "Asam Pedas Untuk Dia" hari ni. Eeeeeeee. Geramnya dengan Ahmad Ziyad. Larat dia biar je Syafinas herdik Ainin Sofiya macam tu. My goodness! Hello Encik Ziyad, Ainin tu *isteri* awak tau walaupun awak rahsia dan sorokkan. Tak berasa dayus ke berperangai macam tu? Si Ainin tu pun dah kenapa? Terima je perangai si Ziyad yang macam tu. Ish. Sengal. Bengkak hati.
Memang tak boleh la dengan lelaki yang langsung tak boleh diharapkan untuk mempertahankan wanita. Bukanlah mesti jadi hebat dalam seni mempertahankan diri dan sebagainya. When I said protect, not just physically but also emotionally dan mentally. Macam kes Ahmad Ziyad hari ni. I wish he would say something to Syafinas. Even if Ainin is not his wife, Syafinas's attitude is *unacceptable* to other human being. Pffftt. And ewwwww.
It's okay if he is not perfect. I am not perfect too. It's okay is he could not throw punches effectively and would lose a fight. It&…

MH370: Setahun dan Masih Mencari

Masih ingat bagaimana anda menerima berita kehilangan MH370? Though I don't have vivid memory about it, but it will forever be in my mind.
8 Mac 2014 adalah pagi Sabtu yang tipikal. I think I overslept a bit after Fajr prayer. Terbangun kerana perlu mengecas telefon bimbit. Rancangan Nasi Lemak Kopi O sedang bersiaran. Sebaik sahaja duduk di sofa di ruang tamu, terdengar pengacara rancangan menyebut tentang kehilang pesawat MAS.
I was not paying attention to the show, so I thought I misheard the news. Rasa terhenti sekejap masa bila aku fokus betul-betul terhadap berita yang dibacakan. I quickly stood up to get my phone - to Google it. At that time, I don't even get the flight number correctly. But as wrong as the flight number could be, the search result was flooded with news about the missing of MH370.
Is this for real? It must be some typical miscommunication, right? The flight must have made emergency landing somewhere and waiting to be found and w…